The Married Gay Guy

Dear Brian,
Hi, I am a gay man who started seeing a married gay man, but he told me the marriage is over. Now he tells me he has to try to make the marriage work. He's telling me he's going to refinance their home and put it in only in his name. But during the meantime, I have told him I cannot sleep with him because it is disrespectful to his partner. Until things change, have I made the right decision or should I kick him to the curb and walk away?
- Tim

Dear Tim,
It seems your married gay lover wants to have his cake and eat it too, or at least lick the frosting. Therefore, I think you made the right decision. It restores my faith in the human race that you have the sensitivity to give some thought to your married lover's partner.  It seems to me your married lover is not nearly as sensitive and is probably leading his partner on and doing the same to you.  Give him the ultimatum.  If he wants you, he must end his marriage. If he refuses (and he'll likely blame his partner for being unable to end the relationship), kick him to the curb and walk, better yet, run away.

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