Let's Be Friends First

Dear Brian,
I met a guy on the net and we agreed to meet. We spent the day talking and getting to know each other and went to eat to a restaurant. I enjoyed talking to him because I think we have a lot in common.  We are not into any gay bar scene and we are also not out to many people yet.  He is nice, a gentlemen and cute too, and I think I fell in love with him upon seeing him. However, he told me he had a boyfriend before but they broke up, so he told me that he wanted us to be friends first. So, being a newbie I don't know what to do.  Should I tell him that I like him or just wait for him? We still keep in contact.
- Jeff

Dear Jeff,
His interest in being friends first, as well as his lack of interest in the gay bar scene, should be good news if you want a serious boyfriend.  He wants to get to know YOU, not just your body.  His previous boyfriend may not have been as serious, and now he's being cautious before getting too deeply involved again.  By all means, tell him how much you like him, so he understands that you're as serious about a relationship as he is.  If he likes you as much as you like him, he should let his guard down at some point. However, you, too, should be cautious just in case he's not interested and is using the "let's be friends first" excuse as a way to avoid deeper involvement.

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