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Party Etiquette: How to make a graceful exit
It's a familiar situation no matter how much of a party-goer you are. You've seen ants crawl faster than the minutes on your watch seem to be doing as you stand there, wondering how to leave the party without looking like an ingrate. After all, you had your share of snacks from the buffet table and more than a few complimentary drinks. The host may or may not be a close friend, but leaving too early can easily be seen as a snub that may result in lost invitations down the road.
So how do you do it?
There are several ways that require a certain sly ability to convincingly make your escape seem legitimate.
The “Other plans” excuse
Seasoned revelers know that parties can be hit and miss. They create a built-in contingency upon accepting an invitation by stating something like “Sure, I can make it to your party, but I may have to cut out early for another engagement.” The other engagement could easily be sitting in front of the TV watching late night movies with your cat but at least you have an out before you even arrive.
“Something came up”
After a well-timed phone call to or from someone not at the party, tell the host that something has come up and you'll have to leave soon. Apologize profusely and say “we'll have to go out for coffee soon, maybe next week, but I'll check my calendar and get back to you.”
“Slip out when no one's looking”
This exit hinges upon the layout of the party. If the front door opens into the main party room, leaving unnoticed will require a diversion which may not be feasible. However, if your exit is at the side or back or end of a hallway, you're in luck. The host will likely be too pre-occupied to even notice your absence until long after you've split the scene.
“It's been a long day/week”
Works well at Friday night shindigs when an air of weariness will likely permeate the event. Simply approach the host with slumped shoulders and a weak smile. If your body language doesn't tune them in, then saying “I'm sorry, but I'm just beat. After the day I've had, I'm surprised I even made it out of the house tonight.” Your host will then lay a gentle hand on your shoulder and tell you it's ok, they know how you feel and will see you soon. If, after leaving the party, you get your second wind, try not to go to the local hangout. Parties often end with the partiers leaving for last call somewhere else and getting caught like this will see your name quickly scratched off future invite lists.
- by Rob Ferraz
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