Make Your New Year Queer
You don't have to be a pessimist to regard New Year's Day as an end more than a beginning. The closing months of every year are an extended orgasm of holidays. Halloween is rapidly followed by Thanksgiving, both of them building up to Christmas which retailers start promoting in August. Once New Year's Eve arrives, it's not unusual to feel a little sad knowing that the plug is about to be pulled on the festive lighting, the tree will be tossed out with the trash, and life will suddenly look cold, dark, and dead. That's more likely to be the case if you're single, and truer still if you're single and gay.
If post holiday depression doesn't affect the single queer community more than the rest of the populace, it should. With its wide acceptance of fruitcakes, sugar plum fairies, and "gay apparal," Christmas can seem downright faggy at times. There's an illusion of inclusion that doesn't exist the rest of the year. There's even that red nosed reindeer whom society shuns and ridicules until it learns to celebrate the very qualities that make him unique.
On January 1, Christmas goes back in the closet, but there's no reason why we should join it. As you make your New Year's resolutions, you can keep your sugar plum fairy in flight at the same time you chase those post holiday blues away. Make your list, check it twice, and feel free to act on my suggestions below.
Buy yourself a present.
Treat yourself to a gift that no one else thought to give you. You know you want that calendar with the pictures of the buff nude males, so go ahead and buy it for yourself, and don't feel you need to tell the cashier that it's for your girlfriend. With the way you're blushing, he/she won't believe you anyway. When you get it home, display it as openly as a straight guy would his Sports Illustrated swimsuit calendar. And if you're a lesbian, buy yourself that swimsuit calendar. Celebrate your gayness everyday. Enjoy it.
Take a cruise.
Most gay guys know how to cruise on dry land, but depending on your locale, the land may not be dry until spring. Instead of cruising on streets slippery with snow and slush, pamper yourself with a cruise in the Caribbean. Many travel agents offer all male and all female cruises for their queer customers. At the very least, you can escape the gray skies of winter for awhile. But why settle for the least? Find a cutie and invite him to your cabin. If it leads to something permanent, fine. If not, that's fine, too. Just have fun.
Participate.
Like the song says, "What good is sitting alone in your room?" Life may be more of a struggle than a cabaret especially for a sexual minority, but you can help ease that struggle by volunteering at your local lesbian/gay community center. Share your coming out story, or, if you haven't come out yet, come out this year so you'll have a story to share. Help with the center's fund raising drive by licking some stamps. You'll not only make yourself feel good by putting your tongue to use for a good cause, you may meet someone who'll offer you something even tastier to lick and you'll feel even better.
And don't forget that June is Pride month. If you've never marched in the gay parade, do it this year. By June, you should have fully recovered from your post holiday depression. If not, well, remember that you'll only have another two months to go before the stores start celebrating Christmas again.
by Brian W. Fairbanks
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