I Want Her Back

Dear Brian,
This is all going to sound quite crazy (and it is) but I broke off with my girlfriend two days ago and I am now seeing it as a mistake. I sat and thought long and hard about why I felt the need to cut her off like that and all I can come up with is I am a relationship retard and had a bad case of P.M.S. for the few days before the break-up. I was feeling really lonely and so much like I was on the outside of her life that I pretty much staged this break-up so we could make up and somehow (through all the drama) our bond would strengthen. Crazy, I know, but now what? I am crazy about this girl and she feels the same. I really don’t know how to handle this and if I do get her back, can I deal with the fact that everything will go back to the way it was when I felt the need for this dramatic split? I really needed to learn that nothing should be so serious. We didn’t have to be that serious, and in the midst of my episode, I forgot to have fun and enjoy her. How in the hell d o I get her back? Help!  - Crazy in Connecticut

Dear Crazy in Connecticut,
Honesty is the best policy, and, in your case, honesty should bring the best results. Tell her you’ve been feeling cut-off from her life, and ask her if she loves you. If she does, she’ll take you back and be more attentive to your needs. Throw in the P.M.S. to get sympathy if necessary, and go ahead and tell her you’re crazy about her. How could she resist? If things go back to the way they were before the breakup, then it’s possible she’s taking the relationship less seriously than you are, in which case you need to ask yourself if it’s her problem or yours. Have you mistaken a casual relationship for something more intense, or is she to blame for failing to commit? You should also ask yourself if you orchestrated the break-up for the reasons you stated, you know, because making up is so much fun?

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