Great article, every gay guy should read it and live it. The world would be a much happier place... - stephen10

Yup yup, practice makes perfect. I speak from experience. and I’m happy to say there were a lot of willing participants to let me practice on. - jayjay2301

I thought this article was well written and taught me a lot.  I will get the book because I need to learn more since I want to please the man in my life and get pleasure in return. - eager to learn

I like that information like this is provided to us, they are useful tools (no pun intended) and sometimes even things as seemingly basic as some of this was is still apparently unbeknownst to many. - restlessheart

It's such a nice piece, and very informative. You are very right about Pitt, but my feeling towards him is the same.

Great article!

I like the fact that there was mention that you should make your partner the center piece of the experience. But rather than make this very selfish on the part of the guy receiving, I think mention should have been given that the he should also show affection to the one going down on him, stroking him anywhere just to show that it isn't nearly his mouth that's getting him hot, it's the rest of him too, including looking him in the eyes - well when possible. As far as that goes, just looking up at your partner as if you're a 'sex slave' on your knees to your 'master' how about throwing a little tenderness into the equation.

When I was giving my lover head I often told him with the utmost sincerity in words and not just actions that he was so beautiful, so sexy, so hot, and most of all that I loved him, implying I meant HIM, not just his cock.

Conversely when he was giving me head I did the same, and usually more often as my mouth wasn't full at the time. I wanted him to know that I really do love & appreciate him, and not just because he performs a great service. I made sure to let him know in words that he was making me feel so good, and in fact sometimes I'd be so lost in it that words were out of the question. "Oh my god this is incredible" can certainly be said with heavy breathing and an arched back, and some of us are fortunate enough to have been sucked off that skillfully to get so lost in the experience. And there is perhaps nothing more satisfying than seeing your partner get into it that much.

I am rather bothered by the fact that so often in articles about gay men and gay sex that only the most basic, if any, lip service to love and affection is given. It's usually all about the act, only about physical pleasure and not the emotional. I see no reason for this & for some of us you're leaving out the most important part of all.

While we may be men and perhaps more physically minded than females, is it not also our emotional sensitivity as well as our desire for the male body that make us more akin to the straight female persona than straight males are?

I'm really tired of the constant emphasis on sex, and purely physical pleasure, and emotion is almost nonexistent. Personally I think it creates this idea that we are just a bunch of manwhores looking for nothing but great sex, and for the majority of us that's not the case. Then again perhaps the majority of us are just a bunch of manwhores as society would have us believe, and if so then we should change that, and one place to start besides our own actions as individuals is for articles like this to put a little more emphasis on tenderness rather than physicality.

I think it's important that guys know more about love, affection, romance and how to show it. Let's face it it's commonly accepted that males, gay and straight, are a bit clueless when it comes to showing affection and tenderness, and it seems more are. I think there are far more men that know how to work a cock and get a man to cum in less than 30 seconds than there are men that know how to personalize gift giving, how to look someone in the eyes when you say I love you and say it often, and that giving flowers or writing love notes for no reason other than you want to.

Which really is more important? If you're just into casual sex, which I would hope most of us are not, you might be more concerned with how well a guy performs, but for those of us who have a heart and know how to get in touch with it, we want relationships with some emotion involved, and we want a man that knows how to treat us right, and not just in the bedroom. Shouldn’t articles be written about this subject more often, and shouldn't these subjects also be thrown into articles like this more often as well? I think so.

Lastly two more comments... Giving head in a restaurant!? You have got to be kidding me. I mean a quickie in public can be nice once in a while, it's kind of a rush, I've certainly done this, (with my lover & not just some guy I met a club by the way) but I think just out of basic decency there should be self imposed limits, and going down on your man in an eatery while other people are enjoying their food is just gross, period!

I don't want some guy eating out his girlfriend while I'm eating my tacos, and I don't want some guy going down on his boyfriend while I'm eating my Italian sausages either. I don't care how discreet they are trying to be about it. That is WAY beyond PDA! And knowing someone is getting head at the table next to me while I’m eating just isn’t cool. 
For god's sake why not just whip it out for all to see? I mean it doesn't take a lot of imagination to figure out why a pair of feet are sticking out from under a table, while the other person at the table is obviously having a 'moment' of major significance. And if you hadn't figured it out yet you will as a few minutes later the owner of those feet that were sticking out comes out from under the table wiping his mouth.

Come on folks, seriously. Have some basic human respect and etiquette. It's not that difficult. There is being daring, spontaneous, & creative, and then there is just being obscene and gross. Consider the people around you.

I made out with my lover in a public bathroom once, but there was no one else there, and the door was locked. We had sex in a park once at night, (and no I wasn’t crusing for sex - again this was with my partner of 8 months) but we knew there was no one else around, and we were in an area that if someone came along we'd probably have time to react. And it was awesome, some of the most thrilling sex we ever had. But we didn't offend anyone in the process.

To most of us sex is a private act. If you like showing off your sex to other people then fine, but some of us don't want to see it. You right to have sex in public ends as soon as I have to be witness to it. I don't want to see a straight or gay couple going at it unless I want to see it, and if I want to see it I'll go looking for it, I don't need someone throwing their sex in my face... Common sense and consideration for others.

Last comment, I don't give a damn how hot someone is, no one, and I mean NO ONE has a free pass to filling my mouth with his cock. I was really disappointed that the writer of this article would say something so bluntly debase.

The fact that all too often I hear comments like that from guys, even guys in serious relationships makes me wonder is it possible for gay guys to be gay & open-minded without throwing away even some of the most basic standards and morals?

People wonder why disease is so rampant with homosexuals, is it not obvious? Maybe it's because too many of us can't pick a partner, we're so obsessed with getting laid all the time from anyone pretty enough that's giving it out. That not only seems to be a very shallow existence to live but also the quality of sex someone has in a purely physical relationship all the time is very low because there is no emotion involved, & that's where some of the most sincere pleasure comes from.

Not only that but it also puts all of us collectively at risk. All it takes is one boy at the club deciding to have his first and only one night stand with a guy, safe sex or not, to give him a disease that he'll later pass on to his monogamous life partner. Was it worth that one night to him? Probably not.

A one night stand shouldn't ruin one's life but it can. If someone did this occasionally that isn't such a big deal, but when all too often those that do have sex casually it becomes a way of life, and they have so much of it from so many partners that their odds for catching a disease is extreme. It's those that practice regular casual sex that really ruin it for those who might consider having a casual affair with someone but won't because he doesn't want his entire life ruined because of one night of hormones and lust.

I really wish that the manwhores would just grow up, or at the least stick with others that have constant casual sex rather than exposing the less risky people to the variety of nasty things they've picked up  from their countless encounters with countless partners. It's dangerous and they don't just put themselves at risk, it is a public health risk to all when people are promiscuous. It's not just about free choice anymore. Just something to consider. - James

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