How to Avoid Getting Stood Up

Some girls are just flakier than others. And sadly, often the most desirable women are the flakiest. Simply because they can be. Pretty girls, (and hot guys) KNOW that they will be forgiven, and thus they tend to most of the "standing up." They also tend to show up late, and seem vaguely uninterested the moment they know that they have you eating out of the palm of their hand.

But there are ways to limit the "flake" factor. If they seem to you to be the "flakey" type ... and we all sort of can tell who is more of a "flakey" type ... I've been stood up, we all have, and most of the time, not ALL, but MOST, we sort of knew in our gut that such was a real possibility. So my suggestions only apply to these "maybe gonna get stood up" situations.

How to not be stood up (as much) by flakey girls:

1. Only plan spontaneous events with such girls. NEVER EVER plan dates a day or more ahead of time. Instead, call her at 7pm and ask her to go to an 8:00 concert. Better still, call at 7:30. Out of town trips are the best ... "let's go to Mexico, right NOW, I'll pick you up in fifteen minutes, tell your boyfriend you'll explain later" has worked both for me and a friend of mine. This works because Flakey girls LIVE for spontanaiety ... often they live their lives by the rule "funnest offer wins" ... so your last minute offer to do something FUN ... may in fact get her to stand up some other person! Let's face it, she was in fact planning to meet YOU when she stood you up. It's just that "something else came up." The flakey gal is THERE with bells on when she gets the last mintute call! She LIVES for such calls ... the very reason she stood YOU up before was she recieved JUST such a call from some other guy who knows her to be the flake that she is. Best thing about the last minute "fun call" .... even if she's busy ... you are now on her FUN GUY list ... major POINTS for calling the last minute with some thrill ride in mind.
2. Never agree to meet the flakey person in a public place at a given time. Obviously. Only agree to meet a person in public if you know them. (blind dates to be discussed below)
3. Never agree to have the flakey person meet you at your home. You don't wish to be sitting around all dressed up with nowhere to go ... jumping whenever the phone rings.
4. NEVER EVER EVER email her the day before to confirm. Confirmation calls are the calls where blow offs occur most often.

REVIEW : You make SPONTANEOUS PLANS and you PICK HER UP IN AN HOUR AT HER HOUSE ... such will minimize blow offs and stand ups ... such lack of planning will feature NO "writing the wrong day in her daytimer" stories, no "surprise visits from grandma" stories, no "friend had a crisis tales of woe" ... YOU CALL .. OFFER EXCITING THING TO DO AT THE LAST MINUTE ... SHE AGREES AND GETS READY WHILE FIGURING OUT HOW TO LIE TO THE PERSON SHE'S STANDING UP TO SEE YOU INSTEAD... WHILE YOU HEAD OVER ... that's IT .. no BS ... and don't for a moment think I'm pulling your leg.

BLIND DATES ala the Internet, etc:

Obviously, most people don't stand up a person if they were set up by a mutual friend .. to much "'splainin" to do. So these suggestions only apply to the blind dates you may have between mutual strangers, and again, only apply if you get the "vibe" that she may be a bit flakey.

1. Get HER to reconfirm via email, not YOU. You do this by arranging a time and place to meet ... and then emailing her the day before telling her that you forgot the time, or the location. Thus she has no choice but to verify that she knows where and when you are supposed to be meeting. I know, I know, Abe Lincoln wouldn't do this, but I'll bet he never dated women online. Her verifying that she knows whassup cancels out most standard issue standup excuses like she forgot, etc. All you are doing is forcing her to basically read back to you that she has the correct information.
2. NEVER give her your cell phone/pager number. Anybody thinking of cancelling is more likely to cancel at the last minute if she can reach you wherever you are.
3. Choose a place which features effortless logistics... you don't want 'no place to park'... or public transit nightmare stories.

FOR REAL PROBLEM CASES ONLY:

(Like if you pretty much KNOW that she's probably going to blow you off, since she has twice before, and even though you realize it's sort of hopeless at this point, you really don't need to be humiliated a third time, the following technique has been used several times by the author, and it's just plain FUN when she reacts. I realize that you may as well throw in the towel in such cases, but it's still a BLAST to pull this off ... and actually turns a painful stand up situation into a fun story to share with your buddies, life gives you lemons/make lemonade sort of deal. ;)

You know you are going to get stood up. You just KNOW IT. So you call her less than an hour before your get together... and with great regret in your voice... you CANCEL because you have to wait for a messenger or fedex delivery. You are CHAINED to the house. You must SOUND VERY SORRY that you are canceling last minute like this ... ideally ... since she cancelled on you before... you can make this little speech about how unlucky the two of you are... that first something came up with HER... and now something came up for YOU... how ironic... and how BAD you feel that you cancelled like this ... blah blah. Play if for all it's worth.

If she is the funster that she probably is, having blown you off without mercy before ... she will rise to the occasion here and take the bait... known as a "get out of jail free card." She will express her understanding... OF COURSE we can reschedule... no problem... and then she will NEVER DREAM OF CONFESSING that she had not one bit of intention to even show up in the first place... instead... since she is SO RELIEVED to not have to make up some nonsense like she was planning to... her instinct will be to pretend that she is as disappointed as you are.

When you say how much you were looking forward to getting together... she will surely join in... and the combined disappointment that you share in having the fickle finger of fate interviene... will leave both of you disappointed love birds in tears. Such is really easy to do... if she truly is the flakey type... she'll take your cancellation at face value... and is pretty much guaranteed to agree with you.

"Darn, I was so looking forward to seeing you later, oh well ...another time perhaps."

And then, right before you hang up, you feign an interruption of some type... you muffle the phone for fifteen seconds... and get back on the line... happy as a bird... "GUESS WHAT, MY DELIVERY SHOWED UP, WE CAN MEET AFTER ALL, AS PLANNED! See you real soon, gotta run!"

Given that five seconds ago, she was telling you how she was sooooo looking forward to your little rendezvous, given that she obviously has NO OTHER PLANS scheduled for such, and such has just been confirmed five seconds ago ... you've taken away the standup queen's two preferred weapons... she is both enthusiastic, and clearly available to meet you in one hour's time... and she's gonna show up... it's a guarantee.

P.S. I know, I know .. I can hear people thinking, "How pathetic, like what's the point? She doesn't want to be there, give it a rest, Rob. .. but it's just FUN, OK? As I said ... when you announce that the two of you are back ON as planned... it's a moment worthy of a Seinfeld episode.

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